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  • Writer's pictureBrett

4 Reasons People Miss the Point

There is nothing more frustrating than trying to communicate with someone and knowing they are not getting what you are saying.

Ever taught a child and not been able to get through?

How about discussing an important issue with a spouse who doesn’t get it?

When you try to explain about the government and what is happening and they don’t agree with you (how dare they, they probably don’t have all the “sources” you have).

These are frustrating and the stakes can be high but there is another even bigger tragedy.

It is not only frustrating but tragic when people are not simply missing a point, they are missing THE POINT.

4 Ways People Miss the Point of Life

Keep it Cluttered. One of the reasons we miss the point of life is we are so busy, overscheduled and low margin we don’t see the point, only the next task, project or challenge.

Bad news your work, family, friends (and even church) can keep you busy the rest of your life and no one will stop you…except you.

If your life is running at double speed you are guaranteed to miss the point. You have to stop. Work will be there later, the kids don’t have to be in EVERY activity. But again, no one will slow it down for you.

Believe it is Disconnected. Life is not random, things don’t just happen. Every good decision you have ever made has one thing in common, you were there. Every bad decision you have ever made has one thing in common, you were there.

A basic definition of wisdom is realizing life is connected. What I have done in the past shows up today. What I do today will show up in the future. Either with results or consequences but my past present and future are connected. Life has a point, it is connected.

Only a fool believes I can do anything I want and there won’t be any connection to what happens in my future.

You know this is true. What you eat will impact your health. What you look at on screens will impact your relationships. What you try to keep secret will hurt you. It is all connected.

Make it about Me. Okay this has been around a while. No one wants to be selfish or thought of as selfish. But we all are, me included.

The harder we work to make life about me, to fit my preferences, to make sure I get my way, and view other people as being responsible for making me happy the more likely we are to miss the point.

Life absolutely has a point, the point is not to make life about making me happy.

Sell Myself Cheap. This is almost the opposite of #3. Believing there is nothing special, nothing significant about me, so what difference does it make. It can pass as a fake form of humility. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less (shout out to CS Lewis)

I think this is the most tragic. It breaks my heart to know some people think their life is not significant. The extreme version of this secretly wonders if the world would be better off without them. It is an ugly lie and it keeps people from seeing the point.

Your life has a point. Don’t allow it to be so cluttered, disconnected, selfish or self-depreciating that you miss it!

In 2016, Psychologists Frank Martela and Michael F. Steger wrote an article for the Journal of Positive Psychology about grasping the point of life. Here are their conclusions.

  • Coherence: This is an understanding that things happen in your life for a reason. That doesn’t necessarily mean you can fit new developments into your narrative the moment they happen, but you usually are able to do so afterward, so you have faith that you eventually will.

  • Purpose: The existence of goals and aims. This is the belief that you are alive in order to do something. Think of purpose as your personal mission statement, such as “the purpose of my life is to share the secrets to happiness” or “I am here to spread love abundantly.”

  • Significance: Life’s inherent value. This is the sense that your life matters. If you have high levels of significance, you’re confident that the world will be a tiny bit—or perhaps a lot—better because you exist.

I am not a psychologist, but I recognize something here. God has been communicating to his creation since the first humans walked on the planet. There is meaning to life.

Jesus summarized it, Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and love your neighbor as yourself.

Maybe you have heard that before? For most it is a good reminder. Make sure you life is not cluttered, disconnected and self-focused. You don’t want to miss the point!

You can check out more about finding passion and purpose here:

Life is too good and God has given too much for you to miss the point.


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